"Tryna' Climb Dat Ladder"

Climb Dat Ladder

A Rap

Imma climb all day

Imma climb all night

Imma super climbin' beast

Now I'm givin' Mom a fright.

Imma climb 'cross the town.

I ain't nevah comin' down.

Mama hollers from the ground.

But she can't push me around.

I'm tryna climb dat ladder

climb climb dat ladder (yo!)

Climb dat ladder

climb climb dat ladder

Tryna' climb.

Well dey all look on like dey think I'm bout to fall

Imma show 'em where it's at

Now dey lookin' so small

cause I'm high in the sky, if I jumped I think I'd fly

think I wanna' find out.

(Oh no I didn't fly....)

Not tryna' climb dat ladder

climb climb dat ladder

Climb dat ladder

climb climb dat ladder.

Not tryin'.

Not tryin'.

*No MLS's were harmed in the making of the inspiration for this rap.  All lyrics are strictly hypothetical, as I would never be so clumsy as to fall off the playground, nor would I be so foolish as to talk back to Mama.  :)

#selfienation

Selfies.  You know you take them.  You take them when you think no one is watching because you don't want to be "that guy" that takes tons of pictures of himself...but then you post them online for everyone to see, so you really aren't hiding your narcissism very well.
I however unashamedly take these selfies and put them out here for you to gaze upon and to envy my mad artistic photographic skills.  And my mad skills of thievery, as Mama had no idea these were on her phone until just now.  Muah-ha-ha-ha!!

Monkey See, Monkey Eat

Like my new style?  I call it - "animal".  No?  Oh well that's ok I don't plan on venturing into this realm of fashion again until next October 31st.  Speaking of which, did you know that on that night every year, you can go up to random people, business, houses, etc, and demand candy? "Ahem..."
Oh, sorry Mama....I meant to say, "politely request candy".
And they'll give it to you!  Anyone!  Everyone!  Candy abounds like ice in the Arctic!  But it gets better...
Did you also know that starting the day after that glorious day of candy, you can go to the grocery store and buy EVEN MORE CANDY for half price?  And if you wait a whole week, it costs almost nothing!!
However, a key part to the receiving of candy on the day itself is cuteness.  The cuter you look, the more candy you get.  So for example, a blond-haired, blue-eyed (and tongued) monkey might get an exponential amount of candy....and hide it in the bowels of an Owl cookie jar where no one will think to look.  Unless they were looking for cookies.  Hmmm.  Guess I didn't think that one through.....

Dance the Night Away

 I took JD, Sissie, Mama, and Dada dancing to some live bluegrass music Saturday night. All the ladies wanted to dance with me, but I kept it to two only - Mama and one of her friends.  Didn't want to look like a playa'.
  JD also danced with two women, Sissie and Mama.  Then he was captured by a seemingly sweet yet cunning old lady.  She snatched him right out of Mama's hands!  Then she and her brood of other old ladies "ooh-ed and "ahh-ed" over him like he's the cutest thing they've ever seen.  Obviously they couldn't see clearly in that dark room or they would undoubtedly have been snatching me up too.  But hey, I did get to dance with a woman that isn't my mom or sister, so I guess we're even.