A Cage With a View

   So we went to this place called "the zoo" on Monday, and I'm deeply upset by what I saw.  Never mind the awesome splash-pad and train ride - they had animals in CAGES.  Sweet little red pandas, and big lions, and performing sea lions.  ALL IN CAGES!  What happened to freedom?  What happened to the right to run and fly and jump without bars?  What ha-

JD, dude, that's just the way it is.  Most of those particular animals are in there because they were rescued from various habitats across the country when they were injured or lost their mommies or something.  They were found to be unable to take care of themselves, so they get to live in the lap of luxury, having all their food brought to them, free room and board....I mean, I think having a few people stare at you all day is a small price to pay for safety and love.  When you are old and wise like me, you'll understand.

Never!  I may understand, but I will not accept!  FREE THE LIONS!  FREE THE LIONS!  FREE THE LIONS!

Um...if you're going to protest the captivity of these animals, could you please protest one that's a little less, oh I don't know, DEADLY!  *sigh*  You have so much to learn little bro.