What's up with that phrase "Sleeping like a baby"? I'm quite sure that if any grown-ups remembered what sleep was like as a baby, they would NOT give this phrase a positive meaning. First of all, babies have to deal with "The Nightmare". All the babies in the entire world have it at least once a day. First you are sleeping on a soft, fluffy cloud. Then, an angel gently wakes you and brings you whatever food your heart desires, not just milk and mushed up vegetables. After this wonderful meal, you go for a nice, long flight. Then, all of a sudden, you're falling, falling, falling, until CRASH! You are trapped in a box on wheels, with mesh walls and scary jungle animals. A monstrous beast lifts you out and begins slathering pink gunk all over your skin, after which the beast holds you so tightly you begin to gasp for air. Then the beast plays a terrifying game in which it disappears and reappears from behind a blanket over and over again, each time looking more maniacally happy than the time before. Then you realize....I'm not asleep any more!!! This is my life! AHHHHHH! (*No mommy I wasn't calling you a monstrous beast....I was referring to, um, Daisy. Yeah, Daisy...*)Secondly, babies fall asleep in the most inconvenient places and the most awkward times. Example, you are in Wal-Mart and a way too friendly scary lady comes up to your mommy and starts talking about how cute you are and how she wishes she could take you home with her. Then, you fall asleep, only to awake in the car, completely disoriented and petrified that the scary lady kidnapped you. I mean think about it, how would you like to fall asleep nice and cozy in your bed at home, and wake up in the nursery at church? With NO WARNING! It's a terrible feeling....so next time you are tempted to wish you could "sleep like a baby", think again.
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